I Did Something That Scared Me…And I Didn’t Die

There are a lot of things that inspire anxiety inducing fear in my heart. Just a couple of examples:

  • Pain.
  • Going to a new place where I don’t know anyone.
  • Embarrassing myself.
  • Driving.
  • Airplanes.
  • Having my mother-in-law fix my ingrown toenail.
  • ROLLER COASTERS.

I assure you that the list is much longer than this but these are just a few that quickly popped into my head. Basically, there are a lot of things that scare me/make me anxious. Some, I’d consider to be acceptable fears. Others are a little more ridiculous and are often met with a “Come On” look. Continue reading →

When Trying to Remember Hinders Healing

Without realizing it, I try to hang on to memories as long as I can. Many people have come in and out of my life and from time to time I will romanticize the failed relationship, wonder what they’re up to, and try to remember things about them and our time together.

Sometimes it’s fun to reminisce, other times it’s painful.

We all have a person who has left our lives under traumatic circumstances, leaving a gaping hole.

As I write this, I am trying to remember details from ten years ago: Continue reading →

Letter #5

12/8/2015

Dear You,

Over Thanksgiving weekend, I got bold.

I asked about you.

Sure, I was worried what people might think of me when I mentioned your name but my curiosity got the best of me and made me braver than usual. Ok, maybe not braver…perhaps a little reckless.

Recently, it occurred to me that the memories I have of you may not be accurate. My head is filled with different jobs I remember you working. Perhaps at one point I thought your job hopping was cool. The spaces in my brain reserved for you focus in on the time we spent together. Continue reading →